


In Which Nothing Is Truly Ours

by ImaginaryFigment



Series: Postgame AU [3]
Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst, Cloud Watching, F/M, Gen, Healing, Hospitals, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Platonic Hand-Holding, Platonic Relationships, Post-Canon, Sakura (Cherry Blossoms), Silence, Therapy, vr au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-17 15:07:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28851084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImaginaryFigment/pseuds/ImaginaryFigment
Summary: And now, nothing belongs to them. Not their clothes, their names nor even their faces. And all they have is this. A spot long forgotten, near abandoned, in the hospital garden where the cherry blossoms fall and they can exist in silence. A break from the constant masks they wear around those they call their friends. Beneath the cherry blossoms, they can talk about everything and nothing.
Relationships: Harukawa Maki & Saihara Shuichi, Harukawa Maki & Saihara Shuichi & Yumeno Himiko, Harukawa Maki/Momota Kaito, Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Series: Postgame AU [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1932496
Kudos: 30





	In Which Nothing Is Truly Ours

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally going to be a chapter in Stay With Me (my Post-game fic) but I cut it out and decided to post it as a one shot instead. It’s still canon to that fic, but you don’t need to read to one to read the other, but this will, of course, make more sense with that context
> 
> Either way- enjoy !!

“The sun...was it always this bright?” Maki’s voice cuts through air, startling him. 

“Oh, um….” There's no good answer there and they both know it. Maki sighs. 

“Hey...how are you doing?”

Shuichi pauses for a moment, still staring at the sky with his hands laced behind his head. There are soft pink cherry blossoms floating down and around them. “I’m okay. I’m trying to be okay.”

“Me too,” Maki murmurs, “it’s hard.”

And she hates being vulnerable, she really does. She doesn’t want to talk about her  _ feelings _ or that fucking murder game. But it’s almost hard  _ not  _ to, with it looming over their heads the way it is. None of them have stopped thinking about it. She knows that. She hasn’t either. 

“It really is,” Shuichi murmurs back. “It’s hard...to see them everyday. And have to not remember what they looked like. Or their- er, how they sounded. And what they did.”

Maki nods and, maybe subconsciously, reaches over to take his hand. It’s comforting. She can feel the petals landing gracefully over her skin and trying to slip between the gaps in their fingers. She doesn’t want to think about it anymore. She doesn’t want to remember how he looked, blood dripping from the corner over his mouth as he smiled at her from that tiny little window before he left. 

‘Left’. 

It’s easier to think about it like that. 

He left and he’s back now. He didn’t die. He didn’t. 

He’s alive. 

It’s hard to believe sometimes. 

“Yeah. It is,” she finally responds. She doesn’t say anything more, she doesn’t want to. Once glance to the side tells her that Shuichi doesn’t either. He looks lost in thought, golden eyes cloudy and far away. 

But his grip on her hand is still tight. 

He’s such a comforting presence. Maybe even more than Kaito is, she’s not sure. She wonders if Shuichi himself even knows how comforting, how wonderful, he is. She doubts he does. 

They don’t say anything more. They don’t need to. Silence, for them, has always been something of a comfort. Silence, between them, is bliss. 

A break, perhaps, from the everyday struggles of keeping up the masks of joy and happiness. Happiness that they survived, the three of them. Happiness that everyone else did too. 

Maybe it would’ve been easier if they didn’t come back. Maybe it would’ve been better to never see Kaito again. Or any of them.

She thinks Shuichi probably feels the same way. Himiko...Maki isn’t sure how Himiko feels. Even as open as the girl is now, Maki still can’t tell what’s going through her head. 

“You’re thinking so loudly,” Shuichi says suddenly, chuckling. 

“Am I? I wasn’t aware thinking could be loud.”

“Mm...maybe not. But, even though I’m not looking at you, or even really thinking about things going on in this moment-” She wonders what he is thinking, then, “I can tell that you’re thinking about something. We can talk if you’d like.”

“Absolutely not.” That would break the peace, the tranquility, of this little area. This little area they call their own, in a world where nothing is theirs, not their names, faces or even the clothes they wear. This spot, borrowed yet forgotten within the hospital grounds, is all they truly have. 

She doesn’t want to ruin it, to taint it with the outside world. This place is for thoughts, for words, that can’t be said nor thought at all. This place is for silence. For emptiness. 

“No, you’re right. I’m sorry.” Shuichi sighs and his grip on her hand goes lax. Maki can’t help but squeeze tighter. 

“Are you leaving?” she asks. Her gaze is still on the sky, on the unmarred blossoms drifting down and inevitably catching in her hair. 

“No... not yet, at least. I just…” Shuichi sighs again. “I almost never want to leave, you know?”

And she does, of course, she does. She feels that way too, of course, she does. 

And though she doesn’t want to break the peace of their garden hideaway, she feels she has no choice. 

“What’s going on, exactly?”

Shuichi sighs, for a third time. It’s almost annoying how much that boy sighs. “I’m just really confused about something. I don’t want- I don't think it’s true. Because it can’t be. And yet...everything and everyone is telling me is has to be.”

“Well, then it probably is.” She’s not one to say things just to make someone feel better. “What’s this thing you’re so desperate for not to be true?”

“I...there’s someone...who I...could possibly have feelings for. And it can’t be true because there’s no reason for it to be true other than a  _ dream.  _ And a dream is... nothing. Right?”

“Dunno. Depends. I’ve heard dreams are a powerful thing. They could make you develop feelings for someone, probably. Who is it?” She can’t help but be curious, even if only a little bit. 

Which her therapist would say is an improvement. ‘Maki, that’s wonderful! You’re finally letting yourself feel again. You’re letting go of that repression you were holding onto. That’s progress! You’re doing so well.’

She could care less. 

“Oh...um. I’d rather not discuss it. But they aren’t someone I get along with.”

“Hate fuck,” Maki offers. Shuichi looks horrified. 

“ _ What?! _ No! I’d never- why- I don’t- that’s not- I don’t hate him!”

“Oh, it’s a him? Well if you don’t like him but you don’t hate him... that’s practically everyone other than Kaito. And either way, Shuichi, I’m surprised you took that seriously. It was a joke.” 

“ _ Oh.  _ Um. Yeah. Okay.” 

She rolls her eyes. “Idiot. If you think you like this guy, go for it. What’s the worst that can happen?”

“So much,” Shuichi says. He sounds like he means it too. 

“Mm. Well. Then wait for whatever dream feelings you have to go away, I guess. Or listen to Dr G, and me, and just act on whatever you’re feeling. You only live once or something right?” 

“Yeah. I’ll... think about it. I just don’t know how to feel right now. Everyone is dating someone and I’m just- trying to get over Kaede and get over all the _ trauma _ we just experienced. That was only a few weeks ago. And yet…”

And he’s right. Really, Maki isn’t sure how everyone was able to jump into relationships so quickly, not even her own. Maybe it’s coping, maybe it’s denial, maybe it’s just love that started at the wrong place and the wrong time. 

“It’s Kokichi, isn’t it?” It’s less of a question and more of a statement, she’s sure of it, really. Because who else could it be?

Shuichi’s silence is answer is enough. 

“You’re right, Shuichi. Too much could go wrong if you have feelings for him.” 

He watches her leave the place that now doesn’t feel like theirs anymore, too weighed down with emotion and doubt and hatred for someone who hurt too many, too corrupted with the outside to ever be pure again. 

And maybe it’s his imagination but the cherry blossoms, too, seem corrupted, browning as they fall from the branches. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading !!


End file.
